I figured it is time to blog. ;)

One of the main reasons that I haven't blogged since July is because I forgot my password to get into this website and blog. LOL do I feel silly.

Since I last blogged, things have improved! I still have those moments where I feel that "I'm Not Alright" but not as often as they were happening the last few months.

I didn't get my job back as an elementary teacher at the school that I taught at for 3 years because the principal decided to hire someone else. I look at it from the outside now and I realize that it is a blessing from Jesus that I don't have that job right now. Jesus knew that I couldn't handle working there this year had I gotten my job back. So yes I am jobless because I have no full time job, but I am working as a substitute teacher.

I had also applied for 20+ other full-time teaching positions for the county that I worked for the last 3 years. I only ended up getting interviewed for 6-7 of the positions. I didn't get any of those jobs either. I had applied for different teaching positions out of the county as well and I didn't get any job offers from there either. So I have this feeling that the Lord has closed the door to teaching right now because He is moving me in another direction now. I have been applying for other jobs outside of teaching, and no job offers yet in that area either. I know that I will keep praying and trusting the Lord! I don't understand this direction yet, but I know that He has my back! He won't let me down and He will supply all my needs!!!

I did end up moving out of my apartment and back home with my parents. Thank goodness that I was able to move back home with them!

I know from the world's point of view that I am worse off that last year, but I beg to differ with them on that one! Yes I have lost my apartment and my full-time job, BUT I am even closer to Jesus than I was before! To me that means more than anything else in this world!!! Because if Jesus is with me, then I have nothing to fear! He will ALWAYS be there for me!!!

The last couple of days, I've been a bit bummed about the election as well. It didn't go as I had hoped but I believe the WORD of God (the BIBLE) and it says in...

Romans 13:1 ~ Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.

Although the election didn't go the way I had hoped, I'm standing firm that the president elect is the one that God had planned to be the next president of the USA. Everything happens for a reason, even though I or maybe even you may not fully understand why it is happening.

As I was typing up this blog, I went to go check out my daily verse on Facebook and this is the verse that I saw there...

Romans 8:28 We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

So tonight! I am confessing that God's word is true and that as long as I am following His plan (not sure what the full plan is yet-but I know Jesus will let me know when I need to know!) for my life, then I will have nothing to worry about!!! Thank you Jesus!!!!

I'm Not Alright!

Time and time again I've heard that everything happens for a reason, or God has bigger and better plans for you, or God closes one door and opens another one. I know this all true and I believe it, just right now at this point I pray that it really is true! Because I can't take anymore of this "junk" that keeps coming up in my life. I know it isn't nearly as serious as other people I know and what they have been facing in their lives lately. I just know that I personally can't handle it anymore and I can't go on anymore on my own! I'm done! I'm not Alright! I'm broken! They only way I can be fixed is through JESUS!!!! I Need Him now!

Facing Your Giants

I was at my parents house today and tonight. They decided to watch the movie Facing the Giants. God knew that I needed to watch that movie again today! He reminded me that we have to fully rely on Him. To do it on our own is futile, but with God all things are possible!! The fear of not having a job has been one of my "giants" and today I am thanking Jesus for giving me my job back! To Jesus be all the Glory!!!

THANK YOU JESUS!

It has BEEN a REALLY long time since I last blogged about anything. This is my first blog on blogspot, but I had been blogging directly on myspace for a little while and the last one there was from October of 2007. I've been meaning to blog about different things, but I just don't get around to actually doing it. Well I'm not going to worry about those things anymore. I'm just going to move forward and not backward. Before I start this blog, I just want to give JESUS all of the GLORY! Because HE is totally AWESOME!!! I am writing this blog only to share with the world just how AWESOME HE IS!! It is JESUS who has helped me get through the last few months. So here is today's blog.

I am so glad that the last few months are over (April-June). It has been an emotional rollercoaster the last few months. The first of April I was sad about a concert I had been waiting to go see for a few months was postponed to an unknown date. I know that is a very minor thing to be sad about, but it was a little disappointing when I found out about it. The day after I found out about the concert, I was listening to my favorite radio station, the JOYFM. They were doing their friend raiser and God used something that I heard on there that day to help brighten my joy! Thank you Jesus!

Then come April 22nd, I found out my position as an elementary teacher has been cut due to budget cuts. It was an EXTREMELY tough thing to hear that you do not have a job after the school year ends. The UNFORTUNATE thing is that I was not alone in this feeling. There had been 7 teachers that got that same notice on that day. One of them is a REALLY good and close friend of mine. We have only known each other the last couple of years, but she is like a sister to me. She is also my next door neighbor. During this time, I was sad, and at times angry, about my job being gone and that I was going to loose my next door sister all due to budget cuts. I couldn’t understand it at all, but one thing that kept me going was that deep down I know that God will provide for everything I need and that He is always there for me.

On April 23rd, God blessed me with the chance to see the Dove Awards and while I watched that show He ministered to me. It was AWESOME!

Two weeks later, on a Wednesday, I get word that people that I am very close too are hurting beyond words can describe. They lost a loved one at the age of two, and all I wanted to do was stop everything and be there for them. I wasn’t able to be there for them because I had to keep working, but I know that prayer is a powerful thing and that Jesus is there for them everyday! Jesus Loves Ya’ll!

Then the next Tuesday on my way to work, I’m listening to the Morning Cruise, and I’m hearing about a pastor and his son missing after their plane crashed. During that day, I just kept praying for the pastor, his son, and the family and friends. On Wednesday, the next day, I found out that they found the plane and tragically the pastor and his son didn’t survive. I didn’t know them personally, but I just felt this since of grief for the family and friends. Again, I turned to prayer again for the family and friends that God would just comfort them and continue to show His love to them at their time of lose.

This same Tuesday and Wednesday, May 13th & May 14th, were my first two days at the Lakeland Revival that has been going on since the beginning of April. It was an AWESOME and refreshing time with God those two nights, little did I know that would be the start of something that I couldn’t explain or totally understand. (More about the revival as the blog goes on.)

Then the next Tuesday night, I read about the news that the Chapmans had lost their youngest daughter. I was struck with this since of grief for them all and I know that I was compelled to pray for them that God would just comfort them and continue to show His love to them.

During this time I would think why are these things happening to God’s people, but different things would remind me that God is Love and that everything happens for a reason, even when we do not always understand the reason.

Then comes May 30th, my position has been brought back to my school, but the principal decides not to hire me back. She hasn’t ruled me out yet, but she wants to keep looking to see who else is out there. That hurt me terribly and I don’t understand why. I do know one thing that God has it all in His Hands. One good thing did happen that week, my neighbor who is like a sister, received her job back! WOOHOO!!!

I felt like I couldn’t go on, because my job was gone and back but yet I don’t have it still. I may not be able to stay in my apartment because if I don’t have a job then I can’t pay my rent or my bills. I was sadden for all the lost of loved ones of my friends and the family of God. I also was concerned for the future education of my students and if they would get the quality of education that they need.

On Friday, May 30th, I went back to the revival (not sure which number it was) but all I know is that I couldn’t go on anymore by myself. I truly gave my whole self to God that night and asked for Him to pour out His fire over me. Then the next night I went back to the revival and I wasn’t going to go until the last minute, but little did I know that God had a plan for me to be there that night. He poured out His glory onto me the strongest that I have ever felt it. The next day, Sunday June 1st, I heard a prophetic word over me that took me by surprise and I accept the words that were spoken over me even though I may not understand 100% of what was said. I just pray that God will help me to understand what was said and that I am able to fulfill His plan that He has on my life.

June 4th came and it marked my last day with students for the year. I was glad to see my students all going on the 4th grade, but also sad because I may not be able to teach again the next year. June 5th was the last contracted day for teachers and that night I went to go see Chonda Pierce with my mom, Toni, and her mom. It was a mother & daughter trip. We had a great time and I really needed to laugh. The chocolate was good too. :)

On June 7th, I had a great time at Britt’s graduation party. I was just praying extremely hard that night as I drove home because I was afraid of falling asleep as I drove home myself. I figured out later that I had such a hard time staying awake because I was getting sick that day.

On Sunday, June 8th, my parents and I went to go see Mandisa at Bell Shoals Baptist Church in Brandon, Florida! We had such a great time that night! We were blessed from God with tickets by winning them from the JOYFM. After the time of worship, I was blessed again with the chance to meet and talk to Mandisa for a couple of minutes. Thank you Jesus!

Monday night, June 9th, a friend and I were watching the Lakeland Revival and I was having an extremely hard time breathing and swallowing due to being sick. As we were watching it on GodTV’s website we were both knocked out in the Holy Ghost. I was healed that night and I was able to breathe and swallow without pain instantly! Thank you JESUS! He is SO AWESOME!

Saturday June 14th, I got to spend some time with a friend who I haven’t seen in 11 years and her family! We had such a great time that night. The most AWESOME part of the whole night was when we all were praying and during that prayer I heard confirmation from God that night! He confirmed to me what was said June 1st at church.

Then June 18th, I had so much joy that I didn’t know what to do but just smile and laugh most of the day. Even when my friends and I were walking in the pouring rain, I was just smiling because I was just filled with the most joy I had had for this entire time.

I woke up on June 19th, and my birthday started out great but then came some awful news. The church body I was finally feeling at home at again and I hadn’t felt that in a long time there was coming under attack. People who I care about deeply were leaving the church. It brought back memories of another time that I had felt so close to God and then next thing I know the church body was under attack. I just was struck with such great sadness and I couldn’t shake it for almost a month! But now I’m proclaiming that I have my Joy back because JESUS IS AWESOME! And I’m not letting the enemy rob me from my joy!! Because Jesus is greater than anything that can ever come against me!

I just want to THANK JESUS for helping me get through these last few months! Just as Casting Crowns songs says I will praise you in the storm! THANK YOU JESUS! I love you so much and I pray that your will be done in my life and not mine! Please continue to pour your fire over me and open the doors you want open and shut the ones you want shut! Thanks JESUS!